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SOOOOO... Who's the Dad

Happy belated Father's Day folks!! Of course it was my intention to write this ON Father's Day, but I was too busy hiking 5 miles followed closely by shoveling in an obscene amount of food into my body. I mean legit - we ate out TWICE IN ONE DAY.


I guess on Father's day it's a thing. Take one dad out when you're starving and order Italian nachos as an appy (b/c that's totally necessary) followed by your own healthy entree (go me)... but naturally you pick off of your daughter's junk food plate and launch in an extra 500 calories. REEEEEAAAALLLL smart.

And THEN you take the kids to the movies without their own dad b/c he's off in Hawaii with 16 16-year-old kids (who obviously aren't with their OWN dads, because the soccer world has absolutely NO regards to any holiday and plan Regionals whenever they please.) So while the hubby is baby sitting a load of riley smelly adolescent boys who are throwing rocks at

one another every time we're on a facetime call (Hawaii doesn't sound so luscious now does it), you're off to see Incredibles 2, where the kids+ (+ b/c we always have xtras) wear footsie pajamas and bring pillows and blankets. And what do you think happens when you come upstairs in my footies ready to head out!? You get YELLED AT!

YOU can't wear footsie pajamas mom!!! Only WE can b/c WE'RE kids and just b/c YOU have a BABY in YOUR belly doesn't qualify you!!

So you settled with your pjs consisting of huge ass sweats, a hoodie and slipper boots - We'll show them.

At this point one HAS to get a large popcorn b/c it comes with FREE refills right! What's cool about this is instead of just getting 1030 calories.... YOU GET 2060 CALORIES & that doesn't even include butter bringing us up to 3K... OUTSTANDING right! When the group chows through that we only have to jog about 30 miles work it off!! (and really there were 5 of us so it's only 6 miles each... sooooo worth it) ...and let's forget about the Italian Nachos 2 hours prior.

And then just to fill you in on the rest of my day... following a father-less Father's Day for your babies at the movies, the next step is to bring your OTHER father home dinner (b/c most of us DO have 2 dads... and 3 or 4 when you pull in the in-laws). So you show up with one of his favorites - Chinese food - and ATTEMPT to shovel in a few more calories until you think you are going to BURST.

So now you see why I was too busy to blog... and perhaps too full to sit up and type...and also...

I still haven't even started this blog's subject yet. You. Are. Welcome.

So let's get to it!! In honor of Father's Day - let's dig deep and talk about WHO'S THE DAD!

The funny thing here is, well, so many things. First of all - there is John Carroll - and his response to EVERYONE we talk to about the pregnancy, including the nurse at our first OB appt.

Pretty exciting... The next step is just to find out who the father is....

Or perhaps it's my kids humor... which has really been developing over the last few years with their comments of:

I hope the baby's black!!! That would be the best!

(They had a plan pre-pregnancy for me to find a solid hot black guy (gay of course so there would be no foul play in the marriage b/c that's a created perception) and make a quick baby... yep - we are a messed up group) PS - parentheses in parentheses is a thing guys so don't judge the grammar.

While my family is having a lot of fun with these types of responses to everyone.... it's mostly the strangers or people I just met that look back at us quizickly wondering what the hell is going on.... that'll trip some people up.

AND THEN - Here is my REAL realization....while my family is all jokey and funny, the truth is that people are going to start thinking that this baby is REALLY NOT JOHNS! OR that the other two aren't John's and this is John Carroll's first! They will think I'm in my second marriage, because that is faaaaaaar more common than 2 humans having babies and then having another round almost 15 years later. I mean I KNOW it happens b/c many of you have written to me telling me about similar situations and how awesome it was, but truly, that is the exception... not the norm.

In fact it's already been happening... they hear I'm "with child" (sooooo proper right friends) and then say congratulations and look at John... then Kinzey... then Jayce... then me.... and the wheels start turning....

But let the truth be told! Let the world know:

John Carroll is INDEED the father to not one, not two, but ALLLL THREE of my children.

Mystery solved. (to be proved mid January when the little white ginger pops out and greets the world with an irish heel click) And PS - none of the questions or confusing looks upset me or get to me at all... people really just don't know. I always practice my 4 Agreements which makes it easy to let everything roll off your back AND I actually never try to guess what they're guessing... I just roll with it :-) B/c really - who cares what people think~

Thanks for listening (aka reading but listening to the voice in my head at the same time) another blog my friends.

PPS - I ran 3.5 miles on Monday morning, worked out for an hour, ate clean as a freakin whistle, and indeed am STILL on track for my #FittPregnancy despite the Father's day follies. #BOOM

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